I've been pretty quiet online the past few days. I haven't said much on Twitter or checked Facebook much. I've only had a few blog posts about our Ugly Christmas Sweater Party.
You see, a week ago today, New Year's day, my life was rocked. My heart was broken wide open.
Some very good friends of ours were having a baby but the doctors had told her that the baby wasn't well. The baby wasn't even expected to survive pregnancy. Or labor. But she did. Cassie was born on New Year's Day.
There is a lot to their story that morning but I will let them tell it. Maybe someday I will share their account.
Christina and I got to be with them as they held their beautiful daughter for the first time. We all cried with tears of joy and of pain. Cassie joined God in heaven that morning. And I will be forever changed because her.
You see, that's not supposed to happen to children. They don't die only hours after they've taken their first breath. They're not supposed to die at all. No one with a heart and a sane mind would ever allow a child to die.
But God did.
God sent his son, Jesus, to live among us and then die on a cross for our sins. I think I now have a small glimpse of what God felt when he watched his son die.
So I've been quiet this week. Thinking a lot. They asked be to do the funeral (my first one), which was yesterday. The silence helped me focus a bit better this week. So I might return to Twitter and Facebook a bit more often now, but I will always remember Cassie.